I began compiling the material in this blog when I was born. But I got distracted. Or something.
I’ve traveled several paths of spiritual searching; they’ve mostly flowed in fits and starts. I often gave up on my spiritual quests whenever I found that the teachers could no longer answer – to my satisfaction – all my questions. Or when the teachers appeared a little too “human”. I’m not bragging about that, by the way – it’s more of a confession.
For me, spiritual confusion led to immersion in what many people consider the important things in life – clamoring for a sense of security… certainty. Sometimes promises (or vows) and paychecks have more in common with each other than we like to admit. Both offer an illusion of certainty that entices… and can change on a whim.
I spent years banking on promises and paychecks. It looked like what everyone else was doing… Fifty million worker bees can’t be wrong…
In 2000, the surprises and disruptions to that search for stability began to escalate. The cascade began with a powerful spiritual dream, then led to a divorce. Then came an autism diagnosis for my son, and other synchronicities and surprises too unbelievable and numerous to mention here. It was all I could manage to cope, week to week.
In 2001, shortly after 9/11/2001, I discovered Buddhism, and felt the terrific relief of feeling reconnected with a host of long-lost invisible friends.
My spiritual quest continued then, sometimes in spite of my efforts to negotiate the terrain of returning to Atlanta, working full-time, caring for my son, and taking on the vows of being a nun. The lines between “success” and “failure” blurred constantly. A gradual crescendo built up over the span of a decade, culminating in a job loss that dramatically threw my family once more into the hazy mists of uncertainty.
Then the spring of 2010 arrived, with all its wonder and terrifying glory.
That’s when I resumed work on this material, although at the time I didn’t realize that was what was happening. I had returned my vows as a nun a couple years previously, and was trying to develop a refreshed sense of direction in my spiritual path, hoping to make a renewed and deeper connection with that joy I had felt back in 2001. The student was finally ready for the Teacher.
From my point of view, the material on this site comes from my Inner Guides. Or a special corner of my intuition… or something else. Just about any description suits me fine. I just know that my job is to put this material “out there” for others. Ironic, considering that part of the material explains how there is no “out there”…
Please test it for yourself and see if it works.
born: mobile, al, usa… jan 4, 1962. opposite the globe from the monastic regions of tibet.
grew up: more or less in birmingham, al, usa… just a little bit of a southern accent.
schools: public schools, georgia tech architecture, 1985… france for a year.
work: lots of it for a long time… retail design… it’s only temporary. gets bizarre when you take it too seriously. nun: 4.5 yrs.
family: yes, we still speak to one another, amidst a cacophony of personalities… i have a son; there is no cacophony there.
bliss: yes. never forget… but when the inevitable occurs, it can always be recalled.